Drunken Darkness
Ghosts, murder, chaos and mystery......add a heavy handed-shot of whiskey or bourbon and you've got the recipe for Drunken Darkness. A comedic, educational, and downright needed podcast. Join your hosts Mitch and Amanda Kiser as they talk stories of the macabre and mysterious. From gruesome murders, haunted happenings around the world to just plain weird and creepy. So, kick back, grab a cold one, and lets gets weird.
Drunken Darkness
Claws in the Night: An Internet Monster Comes to Life
Welcome back to Drunken Darkness as we kick off Season 3 with a deep dive into one of the internet's most chilling collaborative horror creations. "The Rake" emerged from the digital shadows of 4chan's /b/ board, where users contributed physical details and behavioral patterns to craft a monster that would eventually crawl its way into nightmares worldwide.The most haunting aspect of this entity? Its tendency to silently observe sleeping victims before attacking, creating nightmares and, according to the lore, eventually murdering those who acknowledge its presence. We examine the most famous Rake encounter story—a tragic tale involving a mother who discovers the creature has attacked her daughter, followed by devastating consequences for her family.Whether you're a longtime creepypasta enthusiast or new to internet folklore, this episode offers both chills and thoughtful analysis of how modern horror legends are born and spread.
Don't miss our upcoming live appearance at the Carter County Bigfoot Festival in Olive Hill, Kentucky on September 13th, where we'll continue exploring the creatures that lurk at the edges of our reality.
Oh shit, drunk in Darkness. Season 3, episode 1,. We are back.
Speaker 2:And ready for action.
Speaker 1:Live action. Sure, I mean any kind of action. I'll take any kind of action.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:So we're glad to be back.
Speaker 2:We are glad to be back. We are glad to be back.
Speaker 1:I think every episode to this point has been either an old episode or a previously Did I?
Speaker 2:say that right Previously. Yep yeah unreleased episode. Yep.
Speaker 1:So I still have a bit, and by bit I mean a significant. Did I say that right?
Speaker 2:Significant. You said it right significant.
Speaker 1:Is that right, significant? You said it right. Uh, speech impediment. Delays Issue Issue. I don't talk fucking right anymore. I never talked really right to begin with, yeah, and now I talk even worse. So there's some words I can't say that. Before this started, we had to kind of like who's going to say what? Yeah, because I can't say shit right, so you never understood what I was going to say. But with that being said, it is August 16th, the 16th.
Speaker 1:I just argued it was the 17th for like 30 minutes. We're live with the first episode of Drunken Darkness in like two years.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's been a while Super stoked to be doing it.
Speaker 1:We hope to have brought you this not only on Saturday the 16th, but also video live. No, just audio, but I couldn't figure it out. I blamed the brain injury, maybe.
Speaker 2:Always, always blame the brain.
Speaker 1:It's what I.
Speaker 2:Blame the brain injury.
Speaker 1:Who had it blamed? Can I?
Speaker 2:blame it too.
Speaker 1:Yeah, speak. Blame it on Henny. There's some.
Speaker 2:On the alcohol. I justame it on Henny Marisone On the alcohol.
Speaker 1:I just blame it on brain injury. We tried to record and get this Golden Mouth video because we really want to do it, because, as of recent, we now have a YouTube channel.
Speaker 2:We do.
Speaker 1:And so that's fresh and new, and we're hoping to have some new content Up for you guys to see and not just hear us. But you get to see us, right. I don't know why the fuck you'd want to see us. I don't want to see me half the time. I know good and damn well that you don't want to see me.
Speaker 2:Don't even Don't talk people out of it. We want them to subscribe.
Speaker 1:I'm going to have my shirt on the entire time.
Speaker 2:Unless you request. Otherwise, he will take it off for you.
Speaker 1:I will take it off for like 25 cents probably.
Speaker 2:There we go.
Speaker 1:I mean I'll rip it straight off, Matter of fact, I don't have one on now because we're not doing it live. That was the first thing I did.
Speaker 2:Shirt's off.
Speaker 1:Video didn't work. Take the shirt off. I couldn't figure out how to get the video to work without there being an echo.
Speaker 2:Yes.
Speaker 1:Because we do this in the same little room, same studio, and I'm much louder than you and my voice was definitely coming through both my speakers and your speakers and just everywhere. So we have to add to the video and just kind of bring you old school audio for today because I mean, honestly, you don't, there ain't shit happening so next time. If you're doing this here, fuck you. Come get some In a wheelchair.
Speaker 2:I mean, you got to get in a wheelchair too. Wheelchair fight.
Speaker 1:Right Handicap fight. You remember the show. You remember bumfights.
Speaker 2:No.
Speaker 1:So bumfights was? They made this probably back in VHS days. It was like early 2000s. They would go out and people it's kind of shit to say now, but back then it was hilarious Still hilarious, I'm not gonna lie. They would pay like two bums, like ten bucks, to fight each other, and they'd be, and they made a whole series of tapes called Bumfights.
Speaker 2:All right.
Speaker 1:And this was before like, really, like I don't know, youtube wasn't a thing or just becoming a thing. These were hardcore and like VHS, maybe DVD, I don't know.
Speaker 2:That's ridiculous, but it was.
Speaker 1:I mean it was no, that was kind of cool. I mean that one cat we sent today would have got a punter had the vapes in his socks.
Speaker 2:Yeah, probably.
Speaker 1:He'd probably fight a man for like $250. Yeah, yeah, probably I mean you think about it like you ask, You're giving some bums like four bucks to fight each other and I get that that's not nice, but would they have got four bucks otherwise Like were you stopping to give them four bucks?
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:Nobody made them fight. They just said hey, if you will fight, we'll give you four, five, ten, twenty.
Speaker 2:I don't know how much it was. It's like unsanctioned UFC, really cheap.
Speaker 1:Right, it's like the DFC the dirty fight club. You know they stunk, yeah. But Right, it's like the DFC the dirty fight club. You know they stunk, yeah, but they would go at it, though they would beat the shit out of each other for like. I mean, you ask me, you gave me like 10. I'm greedy If you gave me 10 bucks, I'd punch someone in the face, I'd punch a bum in the mouth out of that for 10 bucks.
Speaker 1:All right, is that bad? I mean I'm not homeless, but I mean I'm poor. I'm not that poor as they are, but I'm pretty close.
Speaker 2:Are you going to split the money with them after you punched them?
Speaker 1:Not. If I win, fuck them. If I win, that's my money. I'm in a wheelchair half the time.
Speaker 2:Okay.
Speaker 1:I'm handicapped versus Homeless. You've got to pray unless we're in a pool of water, and then you're fucked because we're equal.
Speaker 2:I don't know you've not been in a pool since this happened.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I can swim circles Like my left side. I swim around you Like a hammerhead shark. You want no arm coming.
Speaker 2:Okay.
Speaker 1:I just swim circles. But yeah, if I win it in circles, I just get you all of a sudden. But yeah, if I win, it's my money. I think maybe that's a good gimmick.
Speaker 2:No.
Speaker 1:Homeless versus handicapped.
Speaker 2:That sounds exploitive. People probably wouldn't go for it now.
Speaker 1:But nobody's making them sign up for it. Like, if you want to join, then you join. Nobody's putting a gun to your head.
Speaker 2:Handicapped versus homeless fight club.
Speaker 1:Just so you know, the minute this podcast is over, I'm 1,000% putting a sign-up sheet on Facebook. This is going to happen at the Carl Perkins Center in Moorhead. Kentucky.
Speaker 2:You were going to say the Carl Perkins Center.
Speaker 1:Well, I mean, nobody else is going to have something as shady as that, and that one guy we talked about the other day, he's going to probably put it on. Remember, the guy with the wonder and I.
Speaker 2:Vaguely yeah.
Speaker 1:You remember him.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:His name rhymes with dough.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:I know who you're talking about.
Speaker 1:You know he'd put it on he's sponsoring Heart, heartbeat dude.
Speaker 2:You'd get a hold of me, He'd be like I don't know.
Speaker 1:I couldn't see what was happening. Oh my gosh, because you're wondering Ridiculous He'd get at you for you.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:One eye looking at you and one looking for you.
Speaker 2:He didn't know what was coming and going at all times.
Speaker 1:Maybe, but he can see two and seven degrees. I would be able to Right, but I bet he'd put this on. Well you know what you got an idea.
Speaker 2:You got an idea now.
Speaker 1:So if you're handicapped or homeless I don't know how you're listening to this for homeless, but if you are, you're probably not really homeless or you're kind of like maybe jet-poo out of money because you're not really homeless if you're listening to a podcast.
Speaker 2:Mm-hmm.
Speaker 1:And you're saying you're homeless. But if you're homeless or handicapped and you want to beat the shit out of somebody else that's homeless or handicapped.
Speaker 2:Or money.
Speaker 1:For a little bit of money, a little money. Like 70-30 split.
Speaker 2:A couple dollars.
Speaker 1:Where did I Yankovic taking taking most of the money probably?
Speaker 2:Why? Because he's making songs about it.
Speaker 1:No, Weird Eye Yankovic.
Speaker 2:Weird Eye Gotcha.
Speaker 1:I like that. That's a good nickname. He's probably taking the big split, but I just thought, punch the Mouse and fake.
Speaker 2:I mean, you could probably find a better way.
Speaker 1:Nobody wants to fight a handicapped man because it's like you, they've got feelings. They don't feel like it's okay.
Speaker 2:It's probably not.
Speaker 1:What if I had a kiddie pool? I mean, I've always said on the ground or in the pool we're kind of equal. I can't dance around and move, but I can punch in the mouth.
Speaker 2:That's true.
Speaker 1:And if you're homeless and stinky, I'll punch you for sure. That's wrong, right.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:That's probably the realm speaking. Yeah, it's probably nice to punch tomorrow.
Speaker 2:Well, you know.
Speaker 1:Anyway.
Speaker 2:What are you drinking?
Speaker 1:Rum.
Speaker 2:What else I?
Speaker 1:can't pronounce what I'm drinking A Mai Tai.
Speaker 2:I can't pronounce what I'm drinking A Mai.
Speaker 1:Tai. I call it a Moi Tai. That's a battle of function. What's it called?
Speaker 2:Mai, tai Mai.
Speaker 1:Tai what? I don't know what the brand is. You need to pull it out. Tiki, do what? Yeah, you heard that Cutwater.
Speaker 2:Cutwater, tiki Rum, mai Tai, right, yeah, you heard that uh cut water, cut water, tiki, rum, mai tai right and then river green bee's knees. Nobody knows what. They don't have a name. What a bee's knees is? A little bit of gin, lemon honey, sparkling water is that a drink?
Speaker 1:I thought bee's knees was like.
Speaker 2:Oh, those are bee's knees like I mean, it's a saying, but it is a drink which is dumb, because what's a really?
Speaker 1:what have you been like, oh man.
Speaker 2:That's the Bee's Knees.
Speaker 1:How many times you wanted the Bee's Knees to where it was cool enough you remembered.
Speaker 2:I mean, if you saw Bee's Knees, would you remember? Yes, I don't know.
Speaker 1:Why no idea? Why is it the bee's knees?
Speaker 2:I said so.
Speaker 1:I really have no idea. Maybe it is, I don't know.
Speaker 2:They didn't call it better than sliced bread.
Speaker 1:I mean there are a lot of, but sliced bread was like Right. But if you were hungry and you seen A the bee's knees or some sliced bread, what are you happy about? Sliced bread? Fuck about no bee.
Speaker 2:I mean bees are important.
Speaker 1:The bee's knees aren't.
Speaker 2:I mean. Maybe I don't know, I really don't know either. What is that again?
Speaker 1:What's in that Gin lemon? I mean, maybe I don't know, I really don't know either, but what is that again, what's in that Gin lemon?
Speaker 2:honey and sparkling water.
Speaker 1:You're a big gin fan.
Speaker 2:I do like gin.
Speaker 1:I don't know. Is gin sweet? No, is rum sweet? I don't know.
Speaker 2:Yes, you think it's sweet A little bit, a little bit.
Speaker 1:I've also got an energy drink because I think mixing liquor and energy drinks is wise mixing anything in an energy drink is not wise but you have water with hydration so I don't get shitty drunk, because I get hungover probably shitty drunk, but not hungover. I have shit to do tomorrow you do.
Speaker 2:You know who doesn't.
Speaker 1:You're hungover, probably shit in your drink, but not hungover. I have shit to do tomorrow. You do. You know who doesn't you? This girl, I'm going to get barely into it.
Speaker 2:You're going to land bad and paint.
Speaker 1:Going to do something. Sorry I got bad at this, but okay. Anyway, august 16th Saturday yes, some Heather UFC fights tonight.
Speaker 2:I don't know who's listening.
Speaker 1:but yes, you have stuff to talk about. I do have some, I don't know anything what you're going to talk about, but I never told you. But the stepdaughter's boyfriend seemed to know what you were talking about.
Speaker 2:He was very excited.
Speaker 1:So, per usual, as I shut my mouth and let you talk, unlike you, I will talk less, because I don't know anything. So I'm just going to hang out and probably drink a little bit and think about punching a homicidal in the face.
Speaker 2:That's a weird thing to think about, but you do you.
Speaker 1:Not for ten bucks. Gas is high as shit right now.
Speaker 2:Everything's high.
Speaker 1:That's two tanks of gas.
Speaker 2:I was like that is not two tanks. I'm weird.
Speaker 1:Tanks of gas. I'll let you punch me in the face. Right, that's a good sixty bucks.
Speaker 2:Easy.
Speaker 1:I just had to say how poor I was. I'll let you punch me for sixty bucks. How?
Speaker 2:many one punches Forty, forty I'll let you punching me for $60. How many? One punches 40. 40 I'd list, but that's taking half, is it? It's $34.
Speaker 1:$35 to fill mine up.
Speaker 2:It depends what you drive.
Speaker 1:Okay, anyway, about $50 to fill mine up. Yeah so yeah, we wouldn't make it $100. You could punch me for $100. Okay, all right, so we've came to the conclusion you can punch me for I'm able to be bought Yep. To be punched or to punch. Do it, do it. What do we got?
Speaker 2:What do we have Today? We are creepypasta. Do you know what creepypasta is?
Speaker 1:I was going to say so I have two answers. Okay, I was to say so I had two answers. Okay, I was first of all when you said creepypasta.
Speaker 2:That one's hard.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's a. So my, Just so you guys know my R's and my S's. Yeah, they're tough are real tough on me. So I mean, y'all might find them however you want, but if you're in a wheelchair, you make fun of me while I'm punching your face. Yeah, they're tough on me. Creepy pastas Creepy Instantly, I think was just like bad-tasting pasta.
Speaker 2:Well, I mean yeah.
Speaker 1:But from the way you guys talk about it, I'm gonna guess it's. You said this is a creepypasta, so I'm guessing it's some kind of like what's the word for it? Story. It's some type of story that like.
Speaker 2:I mean kind of yeah, creepypastas are horror-related legends or stories that are shared online. They're often copied and pasted across the internet, across lots of different sites. They're basically a modern day form of urban legends.
Speaker 1:No one will stop you Uh-huh. Why the fuck are they called creepypasta?
Speaker 2:Because someone named the website creepypasta.
Speaker 1:Oh, so the website, yeah, okay.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:So the website is like creepypastacom.
Speaker 2:Yes.
Speaker 1:And people put stories on there.
Speaker 2:Yes, it's like newer urban legends or just modern day urban legends.
Speaker 1:You can find older stuff there too. You couldn't think of another name, that's creepypasta.
Speaker 2:I didn't make it dude, I don't know.
Speaker 1:Creepy stories.
Speaker 2:I don't know Creepy. But you don't forget creepypasta. You're like oh creepypasta, I don't know, no idea.
Speaker 1:I mean yeah, you're right. Okay, so this is Windows.
Speaker 2:Yes, and they are usually user-generated and the intent is for them to be scary, unsettling, frightening, like just to give you that unease.
Speaker 1:Stopping again. When you say user-generated, do you mean fake? I mean sometimes yes, sometimes no. I mean I know everything that somebody is making something up.
Speaker 2:You know we're going to say this character isn't a cryptid. Sounds like it could be a cryptid but it's more of a user-created urban legend. You know there are lots of people that are like, oh, I had an experience, but are they user-created experiences that are completely made up? Most likely yes.
Speaker 1:I dig it, though, because it's some imagination. Is there a chance that it's real?
Speaker 2:Probably not, I don't know. There's some images, you know.
Speaker 1:Well, you know my belief system, but I'm here for it.
Speaker 2:Even if these people are like it's real, it's real, it's real, you're going to be like no it's not.
Speaker 1:I can see it. It's not, I'm here for it.
Speaker 2:Tonight we're going to talk about the Rake. Have you heard of the rake.
Speaker 1:My excitement just went down from 10 to like a four. Why? Well, for one, his name is the fucking rake right like you mean like you like a, like a garden tool, like a rake no, but he doesn't look like that oh, oh. So this person.
Speaker 2:Okay so.
Speaker 1:I thought you meant this was story about a rake.
Speaker 2:No, I was totally bummed out, because I thought no, no, no, no, no. So he's called, or it is called, the rake. So previously it's been through a couple of adaptations.
Speaker 1:He's had other names the hoe, the wheelbarrow, been through a couple of adaptations he's had other names um the hoe, the wheelbarrow no lordy day.
Speaker 2:Um most notable through the evolution of the creation of this character. Um operation crawler was like at the top of the list. Anyway, the look on your face is so good.
Speaker 1:These are the corniest subpar wrestling names I've ever heard.
Speaker 2:The Rake.
Speaker 1:The Rake versus the Klingon.
Speaker 2:Operation Crawler.
Speaker 1:I'm sorry, serge Slider was a big one.
Speaker 2:Hit me. Okay. So this collaboration was originally posted, it says, on 4chan's B-board, with an invite to others to help contribute details and habits and physical attributes to make this monster. Okay. So the rake is said to be about six feet tall, it is of humanoid shape, has pale skin, it is notably pale white or pale gray, and it has what is said to be a blank face, three eyes, all green, and there's a couple of different descriptions throughout time, origins of where those eyes and stuff are.
Speaker 2:It says that one eye is in the center. At some point the other two eyes were said to be on the back of the head and then on the side of the head and maybe on the front of the head. So there's a couple of different things no nose, no apparent mouth. So when you look at it, no nose, no apparent mouth. So when you look at it, it's got the eyes and nothing else. But if you were to engage in it or mouth opens, it hinges like at the jaw line to open up with tons and tons of like teeth. So tiny, dull teeth.
Speaker 2:It says, not blunt but dull. I don't really know what that exactly means. And then it is said to have very sharp claws and, although it can stand up like a human with the right clothing, could be thought it was a super pale human if it had a hat or something on. It was a super pale human if it had a hat or something on. It tends to crawl around on all fours and with the claws. That's where the rake-like thing comes in, so that it's, you know, thought of as a rake. So your face is just very interesting.
Speaker 2:So it digs in with its claws and therefore giving a rake appearance, I mean I don't think it's so much that it digs in, it's just that it has these very sharp claws and it walks on all fours.
Speaker 1:So it probably leaves like a trail.
Speaker 2:I mean, I don't know, maybe it says, according to dictionarycom, the fact that the character lurks low to the ground, has all the teeth, spindly limbs as well as large claws. It helps to contribute to that name. According to the origin story, which is said to be fictitious, sightings and encounters started around 2003 in Northeastern America, but then the story is that it was blacked out by all of media so nobody could talk about it. Every encounter disappeared and then, because that information was gone after for whatever reason, there was this so-called media blackout around 2006,. We started to get the stories back. It took me a minute because, for whatever reason, my creepypasta wouldn't load when I tried to go to it to find some encounters.
Speaker 1:How weird that it didn't load Right.
Speaker 2:Someone didn't want me to see. They don't want me to know. There's lots of fun little things. So there is a mariner's log from 1691. It says he came to my ship. No, that's a lie, that's me just making stuff up. He came to me in my sleep, from the foot of my bed. I felt a sensation. He took everything. We must return to England. We shall not come here again at the request of the ring. And that's it, supposedly a journal entry translated in 1880.
Speaker 2:I've experienced the greatest terror. I've experienced the greatest terror. I've experienced the greatest terror. I see his eyes when I close mine. They are hollow Black. They saw me and pierced me. His wet hand I will not sleep. His voice and it says unintelligible text. Also a suicide note said to be from 1964. And these are all I am assuming, you know, operators inputs. As I prepare to take my life, I feel unnecessary to assuage any guilt or a pain I have introduced through this act. It is not the fault of anyone other than him. For once I awoke and felt his presence, and once I awoke and saw his form, and once again I awoke and heard his voice and looked into his eyes. I cannot sleep without fear of what I might next wait to experience. I cannot wait. Goodbye, it says. It's found in the same wooden box where two empty envelopes addressed to William and Rose and one loose personal letter with no envelope. Dearest Lenny, I have prayed for you. He spoke your name, no idea, lenny, lenny, lenny.
Speaker 1:Watch out, Lenny.
Speaker 2:Right Watch out.
Speaker 1:Like my smell, Lenny.
Speaker 2:I don't think so. This is L-I like Lenny, like a girl, not Lenny Like Fast.
Speaker 1:L-i like Lenny like a girl, not Lenny.
Speaker 2:Like Fast and Furious Lenny. I don't know that's family. I don't know that's Vin Diesel, girlfriend Vin.
Speaker 1:Diesel, fuck you up, we're family.
Speaker 2:He will.
Speaker 1:Or he'll beat the rake up.
Speaker 2:I also found some different things. You know some of the most famous stories. Woman wakes with the monster sitting at the edge of the bed. Most stories say that the rake will creep into bedrooms, cause nightmares. Watch its victims suffer through the nightmares and then it murders them.
Speaker 1:Shit.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:What an asshole.
Speaker 2:Some things that have just kind of been the same throughout the evolution of the creature. Mostly in suburban areas, it seems to mind its own business. It likes to kind of stand back and watch people. Um, if you notice it, if you give it attention, it seems to make it angry and it will attack. And then sometimes it apparently attacks unprovoked.
Speaker 1:You're sitting there in my bed. You're gonna get some attention.
Speaker 2:Right, but this is like people are like, oh well, I saw it across the way and it was standing and watching me and you know, don't acknowledge it. If you acknowledge it or if you try to approach it, it will attack. According to the creepy files I guess it's creepy files, fandomcom the personality is said to be quite sadistic, like to prance around in the woods, and can often be seen prancing around the woods.
Speaker 1:The fact is, you grabbed her hair when you said that I do picture just a bunch of her just prancing around, skipping and shit, until it seems like it's like damn it.
Speaker 2:I was enjoying myself. Yeah, I mean, you know, I don't know the last story. I have. It says from a witness 2006. So three years ago I had just says from a witness 2006.
Speaker 2:So three years ago, I had just returned from a trip to Niagara Falls with my family for the 4th of July. We were very exhausted after a long day of driving, so my husband and I put the kids straight to bed and called it a night. At about 4 am I woke up thinking my husband had gotten up to use the restroom. I used the moment to steal back the sheets, only to wake him in the process. I apologized and told him I thought he was out of bed. When he turned to face me, he gasped and pulled his feet up from the end of the bed so quickly His knee almost knocked me out of the bed. He then grabbed me and said nothing.
Speaker 2:After adjusting to the dark for a half second, I was able to see what had caused the strange reaction. At the foot of the bed, sitting and facing away from us, was what appeared to be a naked man or a large, hairless dog of some sort. I don't know how you get the two mixed up, but hey, whatever Its body position was disturbing and unnatural, as if it had been hit by a car or something. For some reason I was not instantly frightened by it, but more concerned as to its condition. At this reason, I was not instantly frightened by it, but more concerned as to its condition. At this point I was somewhat under the assumption that we were supposed to help him. My husband was peering over his arm and knee tucked in the fetal position Like a man. Man, I'm just kidding.
Speaker 1:We turn to that sometimes.
Speaker 2:You know I would have too Occasionally glancing at me before returning to the creature. In a flurry of motion it scrambled around the side of the bed and then crawled quickly in a flat no, in a flailing. I thought it said flattening sort of way. Okay, along the covers. It was less than a foot from my husband's face. It was completely silent for about 30 seconds, probably closer to five, but it seemed like a while Just looking at my husband. It then placed its hand on his knee and ran into the hallway leading to the kids' room. I screamed and ran for the light switch, planning to stop the thing before it hurt my children. When I got to the hallway, the light of the bedroom was enough to see it crouching and hunched over. About 20 feet away it turned and looked directly at me, covered in blood. I flipped the switch on the wall and saw my daughter, clara. The creature ran down the stairs as my husband and I rushed to our daughter. She was very badly injured. She spoke only once more in her short life. She said he is the right. My husband drove his car into a lake that night while rushing our daughter into the hospital. They did not survive.
Speaker 2:Being a small town. News got around pretty quickly. The police were helpful at first and the local newspaper took a lot of interest in it. However, the story was never published and the local television news was never followed up on it either. For several months, my son, justin, and I stayed in a hotel near my parents' house After we decided to return home. I began looking for answers myself. I eventually located a man in the town over who had a similar story. We got in contact and talked about our experiences. He knew of two other people in New York who had seen the creature now referred to as the Wraith.
Speaker 2:It took the four of us two solid years of hunting on the internet and writing letters to come up with a small collection of what we believed to be accounts of the Wraith. None of them gave any details, history or follow-up. One journal had an entry involving the creature and its encounter, saying only that he was told to leave by the Wraake. That was the last entry in the log. There were, however, many instances where the creature's visit was one of a series of visits with the same person. Multiple people also mentioned being spoken to, my daughter included. This led us to wonder if the rake had visited any of us.
Speaker 2:Before the last encounter, I set up a digital recorder near my bed and left it running all night. Every night for two weeks I would tediously scan through the sounds of me rolling around in my bed each day. When I woke up by the end of the second week, I was quite used to the occasional sound of sleep. While blurring through the recording at eight times the normal speed, it still took almost an hour every day. On the first day of the third week I thought I heard something different. What I found was a shrill voice. It was the rape.
Speaker 2:I can't listen to it long enough to even begin to transcribe it. I haven't let anyone listen to it yet. All I know is that I've heard it before and I now believe that it spoke when it was sitting in front of my husband. I don't remember hearing anything at the time, but for some reason the voice on the recorder immediately brings me back to that moment. The thoughts that must have gone through my daughter's head make me very upset. I've not seen the rake since he ruined my life, but I know that he has been in my room while I slept. I know the fear that one night I'll wake up and see him staring at me.
Speaker 1:I mean it's a pretty good story, yeah, I mean uh, yeah, I mean there's uh a lot of questions. Well, no, it's not. I mean, what's odd is like I'm not, I mean I'm a disbelief, but I mean yeah. I'm not totally like unimpressed, like Right, I'm not totally like unimpressed Right.
Speaker 2:I'm going to flip this screen around so you can see this picture.
Speaker 1:So it reminds me a little bit of the Snapping Of the Babadook.
Speaker 2:That is the story said to be the rake. Oh, that's the rake, yeah.
Speaker 1:Well, you had me until then. But do you remember these pictures like going's the rake? Yeah, well, you had me until then.
Speaker 2:But do you remember these pictures like going around the internet?
Speaker 1:So I'm in a bunch of hunting groups and I remember posting this medal with that kind of material camera. Yeah, yeah, Was it supposed to be the rake?
Speaker 2:all these times I have no idea, but I can remember seeing images like this. Don't go wrong If I ever seen that. Yeah, I mean that's supposed to be direct all these times.
Speaker 1:I have no idea, but I can remember seeing images like this Don't go wrong If I ever seen that. Yeah, I mean that's wild looking it's also.
Speaker 2:That's loud Sorry.
Speaker 1:The story like, does a lot for it, Maybe the way he told it or the story. The name is the name.
Speaker 2:The, the story, the name is the name.
Speaker 1:The name is what's getting you.
Speaker 2:The name the name the rate.
Speaker 1:I love the Babadook movie. Yeah, but that's also the dumbass name too, Duke.
Speaker 1:Duke Right, I don't know what he will name it. They have a good name. The rate isn't that. But that story because I don't know if you maybe it's the fact that the first episode we've done while I just had to put myself in those shoes for a minute and when you mentioned like he reached up and touched her husband's leg, I looked down at my knee because I just imagined waking up and let some creature touch my leg, or some naked looking creature just yeah, the fact you didn't know if it was a naked man or dog, like so bad, but like oh man, that's uh.
Speaker 1:So our crepaces was user, as you said, generic I mean, or I think, so yeah they come from. Somewhere.
Speaker 2:I think it varies. I mean, like what is it Slenderman? Is that right Slenderman?
Speaker 1:Yeah, Slenderman.
Speaker 2:Yeah, he's a creepypasta.
Speaker 1:I always thought he was like something that supposedly was like a real thing. I mean, I know that I don't he's not a real thing, but I thought maybe he was like. Somebody really thought this happened, not that he was made up from the get-go.
Speaker 2:I mean, I'm sure kids really believe in it because it attracts a lot of kids that are into horror stuff.
Speaker 1:Yeah. Then two girls stabbed their so-called friend to like give her to him or something.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and the rake is part of the Slenderverse and the rake is part of the Slenderverse, as they call it, or?
Speaker 1:something like that. Glad I'm fat as shit, I've never been here. I could never have been here.
Speaker 2:Let me double check.
Speaker 1:It's Slenderverse. We've given name now to this.
Speaker 2:Hold on, let me double check. Sorry, slender Nation. The Hold on, let me double check. Sorry, slender Nation. The Slender Nation yeah, it's spread through Creepypasta, creepy Wiki, creepypasta Index, unexplained Mysteries and the Slender Nation. I think that some of the characteristics of it are supposed to kind of somewhat line up with, like the Slender man man. It feels like it's an offshoot to me and I could be wrong, because I don't know that much about slender man. But, um, I think the main thing I got was don't get it confused with the cryptid, because this is a collaborative kind of thing when we talk about cryptids, we're talking about bigfoot, mothman, shit, right.
Speaker 1:While not real meaning, my book is, uh, still comes from some type of like it's some it wasn't made up from the get-go like it wasn't I mean let's make this story up made up from the get-go, like it wasn't.
Speaker 2:Let's make this story up. Right, it wasn't. Yeah, it. They're not like getting online and being like okay, we want to create a monster.
Speaker 1:Right, give me your input they really thought the mothman like had right caused brish laps or at least warned of British slaps.
Speaker 2:Right, and there's lots of, usually with a cryptid. There's some type of long-standing lore versus an urban legend the Rake, yeah.
Speaker 1:The name gets rid of it. The names are a funny one. I don't know what issue name is.
Speaker 2:I mean I like the name because it's short, it's simple. You would name him. I mean I like the name because it's short, it's simple. You know it kind of because you kind of laugh at it. It catches your attention, but then you know, you laugh at it, but then the story is like creepy, scary, creepy.
Speaker 1:I mean, what gives this a take, a real turn? When it was like I went to my daughter's room and I was going to be like, oh, they showed up in time, turned the light on, ran him off and they were like killed. My child and my husband was running late.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:But much from where I thought it was going to be. Yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it was definitely, and I mean, that was the thing that I got from everything is. It's very sadistic, it's you know? I didn't find any stories of like torture, even though the the theory behind it is it tortures its victims. I did get that it was inspired by hp lovecraft, is that? The fucking scientology guy is hp lovecraft, the scientology guy what's his name?
Speaker 1:because now you, if this is the Scientology guy, I'm just.
Speaker 2:Well, I mean, it wasn't like he didn't create it, but the people that did create it were like you know.
Speaker 1:HP. Lovecraft is an inspiration, must have followed him. He's an inspiration for Dumb Mastery.
Speaker 2:Let's see.
Speaker 1:If that's who this is, I'm pretty sure this is the same guy we're going to find out. All credibility is lost. If this is, I'm pretty sure this is the same guy we're gonna find out All credibility is lost if this is the same guy, the guy that created Scientology. I'm not smart.
Speaker 2:So you're thinking of Ron L Hubbard.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that guy's a fucking dumbass.
Speaker 2:While some people believe that Ron L Hubbard Hubbard was inspired, by HP Lovecraft's work.
Speaker 1:Oh fuck, ron L Hubbard, ron L Hubbard Hubbard was inspired by HP. Lovecraft's work. Oh fuck, Ron L Hubbard.
Speaker 2:Yes, he explored themes of ancient civilizations and strange cults.
Speaker 1:He wrote shitty sci-fi and then made a religion about it.
Speaker 2:He says there's no. Well, you know, ai Overview says there are no solid links between their ideas and the development of Scientologists, except that aliens are going to never mind. It's fine, whatever.
Speaker 1:Aliens are what.
Speaker 2:I don't know, don't they have some sort of like weird alien, lizard people or something or other?
Speaker 1:I don't know that much they have their own, tom Cruise.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's a whole other or other, I don't know. Maybe they're on Tom.
Speaker 1:Cruise. Yeah, that's a whole other Ronald Hubbard made. I mean, he's a genius because he made a million dollars off his own sci-fi religion, but he still comes in second to those dudes that wear the spacesuits or whatever.
Speaker 2:So the similarity between ancient aliens. Both Lovecraft and Hubbard wrote about ancient, powerful alien beings influencing human history. Strange cults Lovecraft featured cults that worship these alien entities, and Scientology also involves a higher, higher archial, archial. Archial, whatever Structure of rituals, archial, yeah.
Speaker 1:What? Who hold on? Who did you say? This was Not the Hubbard guy. What's the other guy?
Speaker 2:HP Lovecraft.
Speaker 1:Who is he? What'd he do?
Speaker 2:He was a science fiction writer.
Speaker 1:And he wasn't the Scientology guy though.
Speaker 2:No, no, ronald Hubbard's the Scientology guy. I'm a fucking idiot.
Speaker 1:But uh, hp Lovecraft wrote some books, I'm guessing.
Speaker 2:Well, yeah, cthulhu the Necronomicon, Ooh.
Speaker 1:Book of the Dead. That's hard to Little Ash. Armory of Darkness, evil Dead. I didn't get down with that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you would probably like.
Speaker 1:Nope, wouldn't like him, not if he's.
Speaker 2:He's not.
Speaker 1:He's kind of.
Speaker 2:No, he's not. Hp Lovecraft was like way, way, way, we're talking 1890. He was born Died in 1937. He had nothing to do with Scientology. He cannot help if someone was like, hmm, I like the way he writes, I'm going to create a cult.
Speaker 1:No.
Speaker 2:That is not his fault.
Speaker 1:Ronald Hubbard the alchemist Can't get fucked.
Speaker 2:I mean, he's stupid.
Speaker 1:That doesn't make sense. How do you convince somebody that they should join your religion because you wrote some shitty sci-fi book? I want to fight some handicapped, homeless people. Who wants to join my religion? Nobody.
Speaker 2:No.
Speaker 1:You want to join?
Speaker 2:Me no.
Speaker 1:I would not, I'd be like this is dumb.
Speaker 2:That's not the yes, I'm not a Scientologist.
Speaker 1:Well, we'd call you. That sounds right, I was about to useologist. Well, we tell you that sounds right, I was about to use that yeah.
Speaker 2:No.
Speaker 1:I just shortened everything up, it got real offensive, real quick. That's my fault, I just shortened the words up.
Speaker 2:You didn't say them. I could see them in your head.
Speaker 1:You can put it together. That's my fault. My bad on that. Putting them together, I'm just not smart. I'm going to use the mouth. That is not what we're doing. We're just fighting homeless people and handicapped folks A handiologist. That's what I would work it does. I've been doing it for 40 years. I'm as close as they get to a handiologist. I am yeah Down to a scientific pattern.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, scientific pattern.
Speaker 1:So fuck Ronald Hubbard or whatever.
Speaker 2:Yeah, Ronald Hubbard sucks.
Speaker 1:Ontology is weird.
Speaker 2:It is.
Speaker 1:It's not as weird as dumb.
Speaker 2:And I would love.
Speaker 1:I want to get them from the inside too. I've already said that once.
Speaker 2:I would totally love to you know, have a chat about Scientology, but I'm afraid they'd sue us.
Speaker 1:I mean, I think if I joined them I can get them from the inside.
Speaker 2:They're gonna brainwash you.
Speaker 1:I had a brain injury. You know how dumb I am. What are they going to get?
Speaker 2:You do know that.
Speaker 1:There's no, yeah, I think me and Tom Hanks or whatever his name is. Nope, tom Tom, I don't know, don't tell me.
Speaker 2:Riddle, just kidding.
Speaker 1:Tom Riddle, that's from.
Speaker 2:Harry Potter.
Speaker 1:Who's he? He was the evil guy. He's stupid too. Tom Brain injury, don't tell me, I'll think about it, tom. We said, hank said it right.
Speaker 2:Yep, you did.
Speaker 1:So we got Tom. Is that Forrest Gump?
Speaker 2:Yes.
Speaker 1:That's definitely him. It's that Mission Impossible guy.
Speaker 2:Yep, it is.
Speaker 1:I want to say Tom Perry, that's not right. No, it's not. Tell me, tom Tom.
Speaker 2:Can I give you a hint? No, okay.
Speaker 1:Tom, I can do it my own, I can do it my own, damn it, tom.
Speaker 2:Got this.
Speaker 1:Tom, tom Got this Tom. He was in. He done that time. What was the movie when he raced a car?
Speaker 2:Raced a car. Yes, he was Top Gun.
Speaker 1:No, before that he was also. He drove the car. He drove the metal yellow car I have no idea. Yes.
Speaker 2:Man, I'm glad you tell I don't know tom what's that movie that he did, where he slides through with just the shirt on and I know other movies that tom did.
Speaker 1:I just don't tom's last name. Uh, tom, I heard bc cruz.
Speaker 2:Hello, right, that was him right, tom Cruise yes.
Speaker 1:Jerry Maguire yeah, not today.
Speaker 2:No, it's gone Daytona. I have an idea. Yes, you do, I'm telling you I have seen Interview with a Vampire.
Speaker 1:That's probably a pretty good one. That's probably a pretty good one.
Speaker 2:Valkyrie.
Speaker 1:You remember?
Speaker 2:Jerry Maguire.
Speaker 1:That was good.
Speaker 2:And Risky Business. Who's coming with me? Who's coming with me? I have never watched any of the Mission Impossible.
Speaker 1:I've never seen Top Gun. You've seen Cocktail right?
Speaker 2:Nope, never heard of it. That's silly. I'm sure there are probably other ones.
Speaker 1:Days of Thunder. Damn it, days of Thunder, damn it. Days of.
Speaker 2:Thunder. Oh, I haven't seen that.
Speaker 1:Well, that was back before. He was weird.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I have not seen that one. I mean, he always had it in him. I know the name, but he had it in him.
Speaker 1:To be weird, you had to have it in you. But Days of Thunder was like a good movie.
Speaker 2:Yeah him and John Travolta man.
Speaker 1:Well, john's supposed to go wear that face now. He got a five head and everything Plastic face. He got a five head. It's not a four head anymore, it's like a straight five head.
Speaker 2:Well, you know.
Speaker 1:He looks wild. Who else? We talked about somebody else, john Cena. He has that scary face, he looked a lot better, I mean.
Speaker 2:Is he a Scientologist too?
Speaker 1:No, he's a weird face. He got a bunch of money because he's in movies and WWE and he got money to get a weird face. He'd look better, I'm sure, with the regular face. Regular face. And I know this sounds really stupid, don't tell me, you haven't seen the post in your room, please tell me Please. I thought that's where it was going.
Speaker 2:No, I was going to say I had a hard time telling him and I'm chanting. No, I was going to say I had a hard time telling him. And Channing Tatum apart. For whatever reason, I thought they were like the same person and they don't really look alike at all. I don't know.
Speaker 1:Maybe I could see something similar, maybe.
Speaker 2:I mean, I know everybody loved Channing Tatum but until Blink Twice I don't think I'd ever watched a movie he was in.
Speaker 1:He was hilarious in 21.
Speaker 2:Jump Street yes, he was absolutely hilarious.
Speaker 1:I don't think I'd ever watched a movie he was in. He was hilarious and uh, 21 jump street yes, he was absolutely I didn't watch it and he was, but john hill was his like and I, so all three of those guys were funny him and I never seen magic might, but I'm sure I've never watched those wet theaters for like days I'm sure this job a job and that's awesome.
Speaker 2:That's what it was supposed to do. It's the new-aged.
Speaker 1:Striptease.
Speaker 2:No, what's the? Alan was one.
Speaker 1:Who you mean Chippendales?
Speaker 2:Yes, chippendales, new-aged Chippendales.
Speaker 1:Right, but you know he was often heard that he wasn't. He was part of the main draw. But also that guy that was in how I Met your Mother, there was the lawyer opposite to Ted's roommate, which was what was his name.
Speaker 2:No idea.
Speaker 1:Ted's roommate.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I can't think of his name.
Speaker 1:That was what was his. What was the redhead girl's name? There was Ted. That's my favorite damn show. God, my fucking head sucks.
Speaker 2:There's Ted and Barney.
Speaker 1:Ted Barney, Marshall, Marshall. So the lawyer opposite Marshall that got the skin infection from swimming in the lake can take his shirt off and bend over all the time for the judge.
Speaker 2:Oh, I don't remember that.
Speaker 1:His name I can't pronounce. I couldn't pronounce his last name before I had a fucking head injury, but I had a brain injury. His name's like Nick, nick, nick, nick, no, joe Mangione, that guy yeah. They often say that he's.
Speaker 2:He would be my draw over Channing Tatum.
Speaker 1:So my show worker said his wife was like this is the guy. Yeah, yeah, he's built like a work shadow.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I mean yeah.
Speaker 1:And they said where were we going with that? I don't know the draw, oh yeah, the draw to Magic Bat. But then what is that movie?
Speaker 2:We just went off the rails. Don't blink twice. Blink twice.
Speaker 1:Blink twice. Chad and Tatum, I think played a very good role because nobody expected to be this first had. Yeah, so I mean, I think he's altering his character. Yeah, and he plays because he's a really pretty boy. He plays a really good like dumb pretty boy, that movie, or sandra bullock, where she wrote, he or she wrote books nope, that was not him no, yes, it was this wasn't. It was ryan reynolds the proposal no, the movie where she wrote books, books and he came to save her and shit.
Speaker 2:The Harry Potter guy in that.
Speaker 1:They kidnapped her and had her master plan. Yes, yeah, he was in it. He was the one that saved her. I thought.
Speaker 2:I remember Brad Pitt was in it.
Speaker 1:He plays a really good.
Speaker 2:He was the main character. She wrote right.
Speaker 1:Right or something, and then he was really dumb.
Speaker 2:Everybody was like real.
Speaker 1:actually, I forgot about that and everybody thought that he was dumb and lost city.
Speaker 2:Yes, I forgot about that movie.
Speaker 1:Everybody thought he was really. I don't think he was dumb. He was saving their life.
Speaker 2:So after Blink Twice I would go back and watch more movies with him in it Not Magic Mike, because that's not my thing, but the other stuff yeah.
Speaker 1:He was good. If you just want something without not without a plot, but simple, Funny Take your mind off things. It was that move White House Down when he played the security guard for Jamie Foxx, I think, as president. He went for a job and they didn't give it to him and he was trying to get the job for his daughter and him and his wife split up and he was like security guard for them.
Speaker 2:Gotcha.
Speaker 1:It was like an action movie. My old man was all about it. I love it.
Speaker 2:You're like you wouldn't like that. I mean there's no was all about it.
Speaker 1:I love it, You're like you wouldn't like that. I mean, there's no plot Not my thing.
Speaker 1:There's not much plot. It's like bad guys want to take over the White House and Channing Tatum saved the day. I mean that's how it goes, but he was good in. I know I fell asleep in the last like 15 minutes, but like what? I blink twice was like sleep. I told you maybe I didn't. I did look up what happened and I fell asleep, so maybe that's why you thought I watched it. But I realized what happened. But which was crazy and it don't seem like a role he would play no so I think it's cool.
Speaker 1:He did play it because everybody's like holy shit yeah, it's totally different but he was very fun in Toll and Jump Street. I haven't seen him play anything else since. I don't know if he's. I'm sure there is something he's been in since that Blink Twice, but I don't remember.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I have no idea.
Speaker 1:But I mean, I don't know what got us here Off of the Rake.
Speaker 2:The Rake to HP, lovecraft, to Scientology, to John Cena to Tony Prudhoe.
Speaker 1:Well, that's because I think now they should make a movie called the Rake, and it should be like John Cena and his crazy face, or it should be. What's his name? John Cena? No, I just said John Cena.
Speaker 2:Channing Tatum there you go that guy.
Speaker 1:But I think John Cena has the face to fight the ring because he's like this all the time. You guys can't see him right now, but he's got no blink face. He's got big eyes. He can't blink because he has so much damn Botox in his head. Doesn't move Face. Don't move Just from right here and he always says you can't. That's his wrestling thing. He can't see me. Everybody can see you, Right? Wow, I wish somebody else would have seen you break out to John Cena, like what do you call it?
Speaker 2:The hand wave, the hand wave Like you, just the fact.
Speaker 1:You, that was good. Nobody. This is why you need video, Because nobody. Nobody believed me. All of a sudden he was just like can't see me.
Speaker 2:So last things that he done, demon Slayer. So he done some what's that called Anime?
Speaker 1:How you do anime you mean I guess.
Speaker 2:So yeah, he was the voice of kizo kaizo. I don't know how you say it, I'm butchering it, I'm sure um atropia. I don't know what that is is that another anime? No idea. Uh, looks like maybe it's an interview. Follows an aspiring actress working on a US military base that stimulates Iraqi war zone. No idea, never heard of it. What is he doing there?
Speaker 1:Fucked up, should have done the movie that you did. You went downhill.
Speaker 2:I don't even see how he's listed, but I don't know. But I mean, but it's Blink twice was pretty good, and then it seems like you just didn't recover from it. Yeah, it just says the actor. And then blink twice was the last thing. And of course he, done like Deadpool, wolverine Fly to.
Speaker 1:Me Right, he did Gambit, right. Is that who it was in those movies? Yes, he was Gambit. I was going to be Gambit. When he was a little boy, he said, and the fact he got to do it was like.
Speaker 2:Oh, I forgot he didn't dog. I would have watched that.
Speaker 1:That's the movie he did.
Speaker 2:And Bullet Train.
Speaker 1:We watched that.
Speaker 2:I watched part of it. I didn't finish it.
Speaker 1:That's the movie where the kid everybody died like 9,000 times it seemed. Yeah, I remember watching it. Yeah, that was Brad Pitt, right.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I think so.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I remember watching it. But I mean, I don't know, man, I will tell you this it's either the fact that we haven't done one of these in a while or something about it that sparked. But now the wreck.
Speaker 2:When I say the wreck, it's kind of funny, like if I wake up and there's man up to my bed, I'm back, it's just the right you gotta have a better name I say I wake up and be like buddy, really the right I mean, I say that and then he's gonna whip his claws out and be like you can't see me.
Speaker 1:And then you're dead. Nobody knows that you just did that again, and you've done it so much that it enthuses us at the same time. Now, if the rake wakes me up at four in the morning and he does this wave in his face.
Speaker 2:If he does the John Cena wave, if he does, and I hear his name is John Cena.
Speaker 1:Now I'm gonna like that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, really.
Speaker 1:That would be impressive. But I mean to be honest, if I woke up and there was somebody at the edge of bed, I mean there's times I wake up and like Bailey is sitting up in bed and I freak out a little bit, so we all know I'd be scared. But I still think you should have a better name than the red kid. But if you're real, that's I mean.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:I wish I believed. You never know though.
Speaker 2:Believe. I mean, I can't believe in this.
Speaker 1:Just I can't believe in that stuff where you put like a washcloth over your face. This Just like can't believe in that stuff where you put like a washcloth over your face and you got like your best friend, like talking to the dead for you. I just don't believe a lot of that.
Speaker 2:Um, I would have to know the process. I've heard of the technique, but I don't know enough about it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I don't care. Yeah, maybe, sure, hmm, I mean, everybody's got their own beliefs and I'm happy you should have your belief. I can't mind. Yeah, I don't think if you put a rag on my face and like I'm going to talk to dead people and you.
Speaker 2:I don't think that's how it works.
Speaker 1:Similar.
Speaker 2:I don't think so.
Speaker 1:What's the person who throws it? Why do you got a rag on your face, for you have to shut things down to heighten other senses, you gotta go in the veil.
Speaker 2:Sure Ooh, astral projection.
Speaker 1:What is that? That sounds like.
Speaker 2:Like where you project yourself outside of your body and move around.
Speaker 1:No, not that.
Speaker 2:You've never seen the memes like ooh, didn't block me from the astral world, I'll see you in your dreams.
Speaker 1:Bitches Like Not what's it called again from the astral world. I'll see you in your dreams, bitches. What's it called again?
Speaker 2:Astral. It's like on a different plane.
Speaker 1:Wow, man, I wish I could, I wish I fucking could.
Speaker 2:So do you remember watching Doctor Strange when she like hits him in the chest and he like out of his body. Yeah, and then he goes to space or something like lose it well, I mean, that was a different thing see, that's why I can't watch the movies anymore.
Speaker 1:There's 75 universes, yes. Well, this only happened in this universe. Well, he went here and went here, so it only affected this. Who the fuck can give up that much shit? Oh, we're gonna. I had a brain injury. I can't decide what kind of saxophone we're going to watch.
Speaker 2:We're going to watch that show with William Shatner where he does and he talks about time travel and the different planes and parallel universes and all of this stuff. It's super cool. I just thought it was cool.
Speaker 1:I mean it's super interesting.
Speaker 1:I do love all the movies. I love all like super old movies and fucking fantastic four and the fucking avengers and all the shit, but I can't keep up with them all you. I need just one fucking movie, at least one a year, no more, no less. And let me rationalize that before you tell me that it's because Superman fell through a vortex and wound up in this fucking atmosphere and you've got that meme where you've got three Spidermans pointing at each other. Nobody knows who's the fucking Right, nobody knows who who is. I love that meme.
Speaker 2:I can't get by on life like that.
Speaker 1:you should talk to the oldest no, I don't understand that you should talk, take age is he gonna break it in for me and like stupidity?
Speaker 2:you're not listening. You let me finish about, because my mom's never going to listen to this about the potential of my mom being a parallel Patty.
Speaker 1:The fact her name would be Parallel Patty makes me horribly happy.
Speaker 2:I mean, that wouldn't be her name. It's like Peppermint.
Speaker 1:Patty Remember Peppermint, patty yeah, peppermint. Patty Is that what Doug's girlfriend's name was. Doug the cartoon show.
Speaker 2:I'm going to be real honest. I was thinking of Peppermint Patty, like Peanuts.
Speaker 1:Doug had a girlfriend. Doug wore his underwear when he was at Super Doug, or whatever his name was. Had the dog? Yeah, had a girlfriend. What was that? I thought her name was Peppermint Patty.
Speaker 2:I don't. Brain injury Patty, mayonnaise Patty, I don't.
Speaker 1:Brain injury. Uh, patty mayonnaise. Patty mayonnaise, that's a lot different. Yeah, patty mayonnaise, that's a dumb name too. Anyway, tell me about this your mom's a skinwalker.
Speaker 2:Nope, peppermint Patty is from Peanuts. What if your mom was a skinwalker? My mom is not a skinwalker you never know, I do know.
Speaker 1:Everybody said they got ate by a skinwalker. My mom is not a skinwalker. You never know, I do know. That's why everybody said they got ate by a skinwalker.
Speaker 2:My mom's not a skinwalker.
Speaker 1:She would have already eaten you. You're right. You're trying to convince me that my dog is a skinwalker.
Speaker 2:Your dog sometimes looks like a skinwalker. She will.
Speaker 1:Your mom just creeps in the house at 6 in the morning. No, she'll not. No, that's what she does to me when I'm getting ready to get in the shower.
Speaker 2:Why are you trying to say she's not a skinwalker? She's not a skinwalker. Bailey does some weird looks where she's a dog and shouldn't look that human. It's like she's wearing a skin suit, a human skin suit or a dog skin suit. I mean, I don't know. We think that, you know, maybe she was a skinwalker and she realized what a good life it was to pretend to be a dog, so she just decided to continue to pretend to be a dog.
Speaker 1:And your mom is a paradox. I think that means she's from a different like era.
Speaker 2:From a different, yeah, different universe, different plane of time.
Speaker 1:You think there's an opposite of your mom out there.
Speaker 2:I think that maybe the mom that I grew up with is on a different universe and this one. They crossed over each other. That's the theory. I mean. I don't know. The mom that I was raised with and the mom that I have now are not the same. They've changed a lot.
Speaker 1:I don't think either, but I should shut up. Shut up.
Speaker 2:That's different, you know, but it's a Gage. Had mentioned it one time. It's been a long time, so I should ask him about it again.
Speaker 1:We'll bring him on the podcast. I don't know, but we'll bring your mom on here too. No, why? No, she'd hate it.
Speaker 2:Your mom hates too. No, why no?
Speaker 1:She'd hate it. There's nothing. Your mom hates everything.
Speaker 2:No, she also would not approve of coming on something with this name.
Speaker 1:Drunk in darkness. Yes, I'm drunk with the darkness.
Speaker 2:Yes, that's the problem. Both of those things are against her religion.
Speaker 1:Darkness Can't help it.
Speaker 2:Creepy darkness. The fucking sun rises and falls.
Speaker 1:Creepy dark things. She should have moved to Antarctica, where it's daylight. I don't, is that where it's daylight Are?
Speaker 2:you thinking of Alaska?
Speaker 1:Eh same place.
Speaker 2:Nope.
Speaker 1:Cold, both cold. I didn't say Greenland, nope, I said Antarctica.
Speaker 2:Yes.
Speaker 1:It's colder, greenland's hot. Say Greenland, nope, I said Antarctica. Yes, it's colder, iceland's hot, greenland's warm which makes no fucking sense.
Speaker 2:Greenland's warm.
Speaker 1:Well, it's not covered in ice, like you would think it would be Right.
Speaker 2:Neither is Alaska.
Speaker 1:But Iceland is not. Wouldn't Iceland be? If you call it, your real name is placed somewhere like Iceland, They'd be like dude, it's.
Speaker 2:Iceland Sounds. Play somebody's ass Dude. It's Iceland, Sounds like you're saying Asland, iceland?
Speaker 1:Yeah, fun of a handicapped man, you're not a handicapped man. Sounds like I don't.
Speaker 2:You're slightly.
Speaker 1:See Handicapable Fun of a slightly handicapped man that can't say Iceland.
Speaker 2:After a drink.
Speaker 1:Iceland.
Speaker 2:We still pick at each other.
Speaker 1:I would love to bring your mom on.
Speaker 2:This is some gentle bullying Right.
Speaker 1:I would love to bring your mom on. If I get your mom on a date, I would.
Speaker 2:What would you talk to her about?
Speaker 1:Your mom.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Honestly, yes, if it was just me and her, all of us, um, I mean One's out of parent religion?
Speaker 2:Honestly, yes, if it was just me and her, all of us, um, I mean.
Speaker 1:One thousand percent religion.
Speaker 2:I was like do you want me to not be here?
Speaker 1:One thousand percent religion.
Speaker 2:Okay.
Speaker 1:And I respect what your mom had to say. But your mom would have to respect what I had to say, and we both know that shit is not happening. I'm not saying she's a bad person, I'm just saying she would not. If your mom said this happened, this happened, this happened, I was like, well, I don't think this, this and this happened, your mom would be very irate.
Speaker 2:I think she would understand more than you think because she used to be that person. But that person's on another parallel plane.
Speaker 1:I'm just kidding.
Speaker 2:I think she would understand being unsure and not having questions or having questions. I think that for her, after everything that you went through, it should be a no-brainer that you were a miracle and that miracles are created by God.
Speaker 1:But if I was to say, but that's for her. But if I was to say the miracle was the fact that doctors and nurses and EMTs and paramedics busted their ass to save me, that should be the miracle that they did that.
Speaker 2:They did that stuff For her it would be that god allowed it and and moved their hands as they should have been moved.
Speaker 1:He guided them and I would say god didn't guide the hands, that then, sure, after I survived, took life a friend of mine who deserved to be alive much more than me, and that that would not go.
Speaker 2:I think she would probably be frustrated, but I think she'd be calmer than you would think about it. I do.
Speaker 1:That's sweet of you to think.
Speaker 2:I do because I rile her up sometimes just for fun. So I think as long as it was a respectful conversation, nobody was getting loud or anything.
Speaker 1:I try.
Speaker 2:I've watched.
Speaker 1:I mean it's hard for me. Even though I'm not upset, I get loud. I'm loud now.
Speaker 2:I mean, I've watched Gage too, maybe, and I'm up to have the conversation.
Speaker 2:I don't want to say to be the buffer, but to take the heat off of somebody else. Say something real, out of pocket, and her be like why would you say that? And it be calm. So I think she could be calm about it because I do think she has enough experience around people and enough experience of her own of being like well, I don't know, I don't know, I don't know, and enough experience of her own of being like, well, I don't know, I don't know, I don't know. I think the problem is the direction, or the advice, or the directional advice that she might give you would be weird.
Speaker 1:The whole argument has made it a lot when we first like, I mean that argument is made a lot. So when we first heard it, was it the reason that so-and-so was able to do this, or this doctor was able to do this for you, or these nurses or this? Because God got your hand? I've heard that a ton of times and that's fine. If that's what you believe, I'm not discrediting. No, that's fine. My's what you believe I'm not discrediting. No, that's fine. My thing is like I won't discredit If that's what you believe.
Speaker 1:As I said earlier today, I have a lot of free time, so Facebook bots are my new hobby. My faith is something that I want to know. Envy isn't the right word, but like, I admire people who have this faith and they're just going with it. You know who can say well, I don't know if that's real, I don't know if this is a thing, but I believe it was everything and I'm going with it. That's great.
Speaker 1:My thing is like, as much as I say, that's good and I'm not just gonna discredit that or take away from that. I'm not saying I believe there's something you're gonna take away that I believe, but like, also, don't come and tell me how dumb or stupid I am for like thinking that like that's the thing and I don't know if that would always happen, and maybe it would. I don't know, I'm up to have the and I don't know if that would always happen and maybe it would. I don't know. I'm up to have the conversation. Yeah, it's tough. I'm not out to lose anything. You know what I'm saying. If that makes sense, If your mom didn't disprove anything to me that I already don't believe, she would think I was coming to disprove or take away from her. If I said right now I don't believe in this and this and this, well, you're not going to say anything to me to make me disbelieve anymore.
Speaker 2:True.
Speaker 1:But if you believe in this, this and this and I'm saying things to make my opinions right then it appears I'm trying to disprove what you believe in and take away from you, because you're the one setting to lose everything at that point, not me. You're saying well, this is why I'm right. Okay, you're making me believe something I didn't believe before. If that makes sense, I'd be brain injured. I don't know if that made sense.
Speaker 2:I get what you're saying but to say, well, in my opinion, because of this, this and this shouldn't rock somebody's face and shouldn't honestly be seen as a you're trying to take my belief from me. It's a mutual understanding of. I have a very strong belief you don't. You're questioning and I'm trying to tell you or answer your questions about it. You know and understand why you might not believe while I do kind of thing.
Speaker 2:I understand a little bit, but in my experiences, the people who If one conversation can rock a believer that hard, they probably don't have the faith they thought they had.
Speaker 1:Maybe not rock but in my experience, the people who believe in certain things, when you try to have the argument or the conversation with them, they don't find that easy. Just to have a conversation, they think you are attacking. And so if I was to look at her and be like, well, I think that you know I'm alive because these doctors and nurses did this and had nothing to do with anything else, no divine power. It was the hard work and bust ass of school and medical and this and this. If I don't give credit where this person thinks it should be given, that seems like an attack to a lot of people.
Speaker 2:It sounds like insecurity to me.
Speaker 1:On who? Me no, no.
Speaker 2:On the person that thinks they're being attacked. Well, maybe.
Speaker 1:But I mean, I also think they find a reason or not a reason. They find a need to defend what they believe.
Speaker 2:I think everybody wants to defend what they believe. I think it's kind of and I don't mean this wrong or mean, but I think it's the American way to defend what you believe in. That's what we've been brought up to do.
Speaker 1:I mean, that's what I'm saying. I'm not defending anything, I'm just saying nope, that's just. I don't think that's the thing. So I'm not defending this person or this ideology, but they are, because they have an ideology, a belief system they want to uphold and want to defend because that's what they believe in.
Speaker 2:And I'm just like maybe both parties are coming about it wrong like well I have questions or I have. This is where I'm coming from. You know you don't have to defend, but if you would like to explain to me your belief, that's okay I'd be.
Speaker 1:Totally. Sounds like a very good time. I don't think it would ever happen.
Speaker 2:Probably not Definitely not on here. I could not see your mom ever coming on, See my mom putting some headphones on and getting into a mic and being like let's talk.
Speaker 1:No, I see your mom ripping things off the table in about three seconds. No.
Speaker 2:You know, what. I don't. I know I can see her crying.
Speaker 1:I can see her storming out and telling you what I'm saying.
Speaker 2:I can see her saying I'm not going to have this conversation any longer, but I don't think she would rip or tear or do any of those things I'm not going to rip or tear.
Speaker 1:I can see her walking out here and saying that was it.
Speaker 2:I think if it became too much, she would excuse herself from the conversation and it could potentially go in a way that would be harmful to your relationship with her.
Speaker 1:Right now. I love how polite you're being now because you're like potentially go.
Speaker 2:Potentially. I don't know Because she's Maybe.
Speaker 1:I mean maybe.
Speaker 2:She very much wants to save everybody's soul. Sure, and I mean, maybe she very much wants to save everybody's soul, sure, and I mean that's so I don't, I don't, maybe not man, maybe she, I don't know how much she. I think, Is confident in reciting or sharing biblical things to say. I'd like to have this talk other than just kind of her own Right.
Speaker 1:I don't think she'd have to, because she should feel the way she wants to. I don't think this is the right place to ever have a talk with your mom.
Speaker 2:I think there's probably a better option of person if you want to have that talk.
Speaker 1:I mean this seems like a very fun place to have a talk with your mom For like. To never put out for anyone to hear no, I'd totally put out for right here, uh, and your mom at school me man made me come out here like I was really good like sunday school, I don't know uh, she'd start you out at bbs listen, I would go to bbs and say you got to make.
Speaker 1:You remember used to make those little things out of uh, there's that plaster, right, you baked them, or did you even bake them or just paint them?
Speaker 2:Are you talking about the little salt clay?
Speaker 1:Salt, I don't remember. I used to make stuff and take them all month.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:My mom all the time.
Speaker 2:Mm-hmm, did you ever do the little like beads that you would take the iron over and melt them all together to make little shapes and things?
Speaker 1:No.
Speaker 2:Oh, that's, very funny.
Speaker 1:I quit going to VUS when I showed up and there was a Nintendo. They lured me there. They were like we're at a Nintendo. And I showed up and there was a fucking mat that you ran on. It was like some kind of Nintendo Olympic game and you ran on the mat and it made your person run.
Speaker 2:Uh-huh.
Speaker 1:Well, fuck, no, why the hell do I want it? So I had to run on a video game. If I was gonna run, I would ran out something I was gonna run anytime in my life. I'm not gonna run a video game to pretend to run, to make a fake character run that sounds funny and that that was last time I went. It's like Dance.
Speaker 2:Dance Revolution. People love that.
Speaker 1:If I could dance.
Speaker 2:So I went to that.
Speaker 1:I mean, I was 10 years old Okay, I mean, that's been a long time ago but I used to bake things. I used to take little clay models to my mom.
Speaker 2:I remember trying to start a youth group once at a church.
Speaker 1:Start a youth group.
Speaker 2:Yeah, there was a lady that came in and she was really wanting to get more youth members active, because most of the church was old people and then a few people that had babies. But that youth age once kids were old enough to give a little pushback was really just not there. Well, my grandma would stand at the end of your bed and scream until you went to church sometimes. Sometimes she'd let you out of it. She would like she would flat, almost drag you out of the bed. Sometimes she was like you will be going, okay. You know, I didn't like to stay on saturday nights a lot of times because of it, because I didn't love their church.
Speaker 2:It was like the screaming, like and the lord said yeah yeah, I was struck down with that, that's that kind of thing yeah fierce fury so, like a lady had started coming and she was a little bit younger and she was like I want to like get the youth coming and we done like vbs one year, and she wanted to do like youth group. But then they were we don't believe in music or dancing and it was like, okay, what about you guys play the piano and hymns? And they're like that's different. Okay, we watched Veggie Tales, yeah, yep, so you can imagine how that went over and how big that youth group got at 13 watching Veggie Tales. I'd love to.
Speaker 1:Pentecostal folks like music. This was not Pentecostal. How big that youth group got at like 13 watching VeggieTales. I'd love to yeah. Pentecostal folks like music.
Speaker 2:This was not Pentecostal.
Speaker 1:They like music though.
Speaker 2:It was Westland, actually, oh.
Speaker 1:I never knew it was Westland. I used to date a girl. Her grandma was Westland. Yeah, I never knew what that was.
Speaker 2:It was just like one preacher that kind of came through and I don't think he stayed super long because before him people played like guitar. There was a little bit acoustic, but they didn't ever get super crazy. We weren't like Christian rock in it or anything. Yes, yeah. I also remember going to church once and it was really, um, embarrassing, let's, let's just say embarrassing, because if you know me, you know I'm a teenage mom Um, not now, but I was, I was a teenage mom. I was a teen mom um and she had about my grandma made me go to church on mother's day.
Speaker 2:They were like all the moms stand up. So of course you know she made me stand up. I wasn't going to, not that I was ashamed of being a mom, but I knew it was going to get weird.
Speaker 2:Um, and they were like who's the youngest mom here and made everybody say like their age, uh yeah, and I was like I'm 17 and I got a flower to take home for being the youngest mom and it was very awkward and I felt like a little chastised because everybody then looked at me for being an unmarried teenage mom.
Speaker 1:yeah, it was, uh, it was very awkward, did they give you a flower because you didn't have yours anymore.
Speaker 2:The youngest mom and the oldest mom got to take a planter, flower, plant home Say this is what I did, this makes no sense.
Speaker 1:You just made me feel bad.
Speaker 2:And I guarantee that nobody expected a 17 year old unmarried girl to stand up and be like I'm here. They probably thought it was going to be like some newly married, like 20 year old, unmarried girl to stand up and be like I'm here. They probably thought it was going to be like some newly married, like 20 year old, 20 years.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and then my grandma made me go and my mom made me go when I was 17. And I don't have a husband and I don't have a baby, and they were like you can still have a baby.
Speaker 1:You should have gave them the trifecta. It was made out of wedlock.
Speaker 2:Well, I mean, they knew that when I said I'm married.
Speaker 1:Wedlock didn't mean I was confused for wedlock, they were like you and your bastard child can have this flower.
Speaker 2:He's gonna need it. Teach him to be better. What was?
Speaker 1:this about. That's why I can't go. I don't Listen if you go to church and that's your thing. Man, that is awesome if you find some people.
Speaker 2:I'll be honest, my grandma had been to that church since I was a baby or before, so everybody was very, very kind to me, but it was still exceptionally awkward.
Speaker 1:I have the same view that a ton of people have in my shoes. I think I have been judged more at church than I ever have anywhere else in the world, and I was asked once to cover my tattoos up when I went to church.
Speaker 2:My dad was asked to cut his hair.
Speaker 1:Yeah, see, you can fuck off at that point.
Speaker 2:Yeah, he never went back.
Speaker 1:You came to me I'd been there several days in a row and I'd been there several days in a row and I'd been there during vacation bible school and the adults stayed upstairs and I was upstairs with the adults on like a random tuesday not even a church day, fucking tuesday and the preacher leaned over the pew in front of me and said, uh hey, mitch, and I said yes, and I raised up for his ear or for my ear, because he wanted to whisper.
Speaker 1:And he said I just wonder if maybe we can get you to cover your tattoos up next time. And I said probably not. And I got up and I walked out and I limped, of course, so I'm sure a slow walk and I walked right out and had the big doors. They were shut, so I opened both doors at the same time and they made that churchy sound they made and I walked out and I went home and I was dating another girl who went there to that church and she showed up at my house like two hours later was like what happened to you? And I told her the preacher was an asshole and you know what's sad, and maybe I'm wrong.
Speaker 2:I could be wrong, but from my experience with some of the places that I've been to, had you come that day and your tattoos were showing, and you came the next time, even though he asked you to cover them, but you covered them. You were going to be somebody that they talked about. Look at the change that the Lord has made in his life. When he used to show these things, these markings on his body that were wrong, wow. And now he's covering them because of God.
Speaker 1:Well, I didn't.
Speaker 2:And I could be wrong, because not all churches are like this. I don't want to like.
Speaker 1:Because I was taught you're supposed to come as you are and shit.
Speaker 2:Come as you are. Come and see.
Speaker 1:Come and see no way it's supposed to judge you and you're supposed to feel comfortable to go there, regardless of what you did or what you look like.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 2:It is tough because I have been to many places that I have felt exceptionally welcome. I've been to more places that I have felt exceptionally awkward and I will be the first to admit I was a big, very into church at some point in my life and I was very big into feel good church. I'm trying to not name names because I don't want to, like you know, be horrible because you know, I don't know, but one of the very like stick out things that I think was probably good for the feel-good church was they. They asked the question when someone says church and steeple, what do you think of? And the majority of people that answered the question said hypocrite, hypocritical judgment, it was. It was all a very negative connotation which was quite eye-opening and, honestly, an exceptionally sad thing to hear it.
Speaker 1:I'm not saying that is very sad. I'm not saying that had that moment not happened I'd be a big churchgoer. Now I'm not saying that. But if there's ever a chance to maybe not make me a churchgoer, but definitely push me away from it, it was that time. Yeah, you know, I'm not saying if you wouldn't have said anything, everybody would have been like, well shit, this is the best place in the world I'm going to be every day. But what you did was definitely drove me away.
Speaker 2:I've told you the story of going to a church with all of the people that lived on my street, all of my neighbors who spoke to me on a daily basis or at least weekly basis, that offered to watch my kids, that talked to me in public but at church did not speak, and everybody I was with was invited back, except for me. They walked right past me as though they didn't know me and didn't talk to me on a regular basis because I didn't look the part. I wore the makeup, my hair was dyed and they didn't believe in those things, and at that point I was like okay, like okay. Well, this didn't feel godly, this is definitely not the place for me and, by all means, if I was the person that looked that way, I should be the one invited back to save my soul right to hopefully feed me the milk of the word so that I would make in turn for my wicked ways.
Speaker 2:I was always taught that you should feed with milk like you would an infant. The sweetness of the word before you got into the meat of the word.
Speaker 1:That's a lot of shit there. I know that I was told I couldn't have wine or crackers because I wasn't a member of the church.
Speaker 2:You should never take communion if you are not a member or a believer. At that point you're getting a snack. It's not allowed. You can't eat Jesus. What is? You can't snack on Jesus if you don't believe in him. I don't understand that.
Speaker 1:Why is there a difference of different data?
Speaker 2:I don't understand why wine, the bread of life and the blood of Jesus.
Speaker 1:Oh.
Speaker 2:Well for dad. I just don't understand why wine, the bread of life and the blood of Jesus, oh Well, and I could be wrong about that, but I think that's.
Speaker 1:How do we get wine, though? How do we just start drinking wine?
Speaker 2:Jesus turned water into wine.
Speaker 1:So you can give like whatever.
Speaker 2:A lot of places just do grape juice.
Speaker 1:That's not, Then you're lying. It'll be about it. It'll be about it Like give wine. Like give wine.
Speaker 2:Well, there's a legality in giving children alcoholic beverages.
Speaker 1:Did Jesus give wine to kids? I have no idea.
Speaker 2:Well, it was a different time, a different place. It wasn't in America, jesus was not American.
Speaker 1:He was.
Speaker 2:Jesus. Maybe he was also not Spanish, so he was Middle Eastern.
Speaker 1:I don't know the term for Jesus in Middle Eastern. I would say it, but I don't know what is it.
Speaker 2:I don't know.
Speaker 1:Jesus. I don't know if I doubt Jesus. Jesus Wow. Speech impediment.
Speaker 2:Jesus was a real person. Regardless of whether or not you believe that he was, I never doubt that.
Speaker 1:I don't think I never doubt that the. Messiah. I'm not saying Jesus wasn't a real person, but my issues with the whole. You know the other guy and also Mary getting pregnant.
Speaker 2:As a virgin.
Speaker 1:Right. Yeah, I don't know what happened. You done dabbled in something. He was dead. That's just not the way it works. I don't think so. That's just not the way it works.
Speaker 2:I don't think that's not what science tells us that he was a miracle.
Speaker 1:So who? If didn't? So who is Jesus a dad? If not, that's if it happened the way it was said to happen. But if it didn't happen, who was the dad born in the fruit box to make?
Speaker 2:juice, I mean, one would assume, joseph.
Speaker 1:Is there a theory that Joseph is the dad? I mean, I don't think there was. Dna back then Right, but there's also a story about a rake.
Speaker 2:I'm sure there's all kinds of theories.
Speaker 1:So who was Joseph?
Speaker 2:Joseph was Mary's fiance.
Speaker 1:Well, we guess we know it was him. Why is there a question? What? So? We don't know if the fiance got her pregnant.
Speaker 2:They say she was a virgin.
Speaker 1:This has been episode one. I don't know what to say.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:I didn't know that joseph was mary's boo boo thing that plays a whole different role. I cannot believe that you didn't know that you can't, you went to vbs, that's like I went for the snacks and the little things to take my mom and then they said no snacks for you and I said I'm out. They said no snacks for you and I said I'm out. They said no snacks and you got to run in this mat and I was like it's Wednesday night, there's something better I could do.
Speaker 2:Well.
Speaker 1:Not saying that was appropriate, but at 10 years old I didn't even know. At 10 years old I didn't want to go. I went for the snacks and the fun time, I thought all of VBS was fun. They gave me a mat and said Run on this. I didn't get anywhere. I ran and got nowhere.
Speaker 2:There's not enough time Tonight To tell you all of my VBS experiences, but or just all of my church experiences, all the things Throughout life that was church and all the people I went to church with, and all the different churches that my parents never took me to, that I went with the neighbors.
Speaker 1:I mean I had one VBS story after, but it's probably best left unsaid and buried.
Speaker 2:As long as it wasn't like someone should be arrested for it, don't bury it. If it's that, let them know.
Speaker 1:You mean like for the?
Speaker 2:person buried Huh.
Speaker 1:No, go ahead. Okay, I didn't kill anybody.
Speaker 2:No, no, no, I didn't mean that, Like as long as you weren't like assaulted or something.
Speaker 1:No, I think I was just like 14, 15 years old. I wasn't assaulted, I'm just saying.
Speaker 2:I think I was like 14 or 15, so it was fine. No no, basically I was consenting.
Speaker 1:I think that's basically it. I just have a hard time believing in things.
Speaker 2:Like the rake.
Speaker 1:Well, I do have a hard time believing in the rake, and it's because it's made up. That's why and the fact is it's a corn-ass nickname the rake.
Speaker 2:What's your nickname?
Speaker 1:I'm not stalking people in the middle of the night. What's?
Speaker 2:your nickname.
Speaker 1:If I was a killer.
Speaker 2:What's your nickname?
Speaker 1:If I was a killer, hold on Nope.
Speaker 2:What's your last nickname that someone gave you?
Speaker 1:I was 13 and played football.
Speaker 2:What was it? Tank Tank. You know why the tank.
Speaker 1:Because I ran the fuck over people. What's?
Speaker 2:he do Rape people? I'm just asking. So I woke up and was like oh hey, you're here.
Speaker 1:Good, there's a driveway and he's fixed.
Speaker 2:He raped it. But you know what I can't think of a nickname I've ever had.
Speaker 1:Did you know about?
Speaker 2:Well, yeah. I'm sure I've got all kinds what nickname did I have in school, that you heard. I don't remember none Right. My brother was Cookie.
Speaker 1:That's dumb.
Speaker 2:Or Bo Cook, because you know whatever, or Bo Cock because it looks similar. Yeah.
Speaker 1:That's probably the only thing we ever might have called you.
Speaker 2:Like Amanda Bo Cock, I mean everybody called me that Right.
Speaker 1:That's as far as I got.
Speaker 2:I mean, people just assume that by looking at my last name, what brother got called Eric I? Don't know, yeah, that's what his buddies call him. I don't even Nick had a coordinate name.
Speaker 1:I'd like to call him that randomly.
Speaker 2:I don't know. He started following my TikTok, I like to call him, nicole.
Speaker 1:He's big and I'm handicapped, so if we fought, I'd lose. You would. If we'd have fought before I was handicapped, we'd have lost. But if we fought over the wheelchair, I'd get a fucking chance. Maybe, yeah, vince is pushing us at each other.
Speaker 2:Maybe, I better put kylie, push me, and she, she'd just give it hell, we're gonna have to go back to the fam for some holiday shenanigans we take two wheelchairs two wheelchairs and we're gonna have wheelchair fights and wig fights. First one to snatch the wig off the other's head. Yep Got to snatch wigs off each other's heads.
Speaker 1:That's why I'm punching people in the face in a wheelchair. We can go now and get in the lake and do it, but that's dangerous.
Speaker 2:That is dangerous. Someone will drown.
Speaker 1:Then you lose outrightly.
Speaker 2:You definitely are the loser if you drown.
Speaker 1:Right, and I don't know why I got two chances in me. I probably just had one. Yeah, I probably would have said no.
Speaker 2:Maybe not in the.
Speaker 1:Did you want to be like I told you? Told you, you fucked around. That's what happens.
Speaker 2:She wouldn't say it like that.
Speaker 1:Why don't you be like I told you? You done messed around, mm-hmm, done her chances.
Speaker 2:She would have been like that was dumb as shit as shit, Because sometimes she will say that word you done pissed a big man off, and that's what happens. Got his ass whooped. She will say ass and shit sometimes, but the F word is a negative which is curse.
Speaker 1:words are funny to me Because curse words, how some are worse than others. Well, it's because they were invented by me. Nope, God was like fuck, I'm gonna be bad.
Speaker 2:It's because God says not to curse, but we made this up Right, I imagine. For me, cursing is more in the sense of like putting curses on people. Don't be cursing anybody.
Speaker 1:Who the hell came up and said well, I know fuck is bad to people, but we're going to put it on the list of worst things to say.
Speaker 2:And then, of course, you know, do not take the Lord's name in vain, I imagine that being so Like GD saying you know whatever.
Speaker 1:Right, I assume we're.
Speaker 2:Sometimes feels exceptionally bad. To me it did for a very, very long time.
Speaker 1:If he damned something is it wrong to say that he Then God damned it Right? Is it wrong to say that he Then God damned it?
Speaker 2:Right, Is that wrong to say? I imagine being like Jesus is much worse, Because that feels like you are taking his name in vain. To me more so.
Speaker 1:I just think that we didn't. If we all say in, and what I mean right now, we're hardcore and I'm not saying you're not, whatever God believers and Jesus believers, whatever. Still, if I read the Bible, front to back, there's no way in there where God said well, the word fuck is bad. He didn't. So maybe you think it's an ugly word because you don't like the way it is. I get it, right. But you can't say that should be in the same category. I can understand people being like well, you can't say the Lord's name in vain, whatever, I get it, but shit, asshole and wouldn't know. My favorite.
Speaker 2:Fuck.
Speaker 1:Well, yeah.
Speaker 2:Oh, the C word.
Speaker 1:I just like I savor it's my favorite.
Speaker 2:It is also the people I work with's favorite. It's my favorite to use. It's my favorite to use because you the second you use it, someone becomes that.
Speaker 1:Well, you've had to really be one to get it, and so I look for the chances to.
Speaker 2:What Nothing.
Speaker 1:Just album me for it.
Speaker 2:We'll talk about it later. Not really.
Speaker 1:Maybe you don't have to be one, but you've had to really invoke some feelings in me to use the word, so I look forward to using it because you really brought it Like in my mind that incident has really been deserving of that word. Okay, Except when I woke up in the hospital and said it was.
Speaker 2:I don't think you said that.
Speaker 1:Oh what? No, that's good. I mean I've called plenty of people that.
Speaker 2:It was the Nazi word that you called me.
Speaker 1:Did you say the Nazi word and then said the word? I called you a Nazi because I wanted something to fucking drink. We've had this conversation. All you do is lie. I wanted something to fucking drink. We've had this conversation. All you do is lie and give me something to drink.
Speaker 2:I wasn't lying for you.
Speaker 1:You're dying to husband who came back from the dead to be with you and you couldn't give him something to drink.
Speaker 2:Nope, because they said he can't have anything to drink because it will go into his lungs and he will get sick.
Speaker 1:They said it may.
Speaker 2:Said he might get pneumonia and die if you give this to him, or he may die of thirst. And if he arrests again, we don't know that we can get him back.
Speaker 1:And he may die of thirst. Nope Of thirst. They were giving you plenty of thirst. How would you like that to be my obituary? Here lies Mitchell. He died of thirst.
Speaker 2:You weren't going to die of thirst. I felt like it. Also, if you die, I get to choose what goes in your obituary.
Speaker 1:Well, not now, obviously, I wouldn't put that on there, I'd change it. I wrote mine. It's in my wallet, it's in my wallet.
Speaker 2:Have you paid for it?
Speaker 1:Who got paid?
Speaker 2:You pay per word for an obituary.
Speaker 1:I know the corner in this town. He is a friend of mine. I will go there. And you know what your obituary said giant penis is what it's going to say.
Speaker 2:It's going to say it was a heart attack, If the coroner in this town does it he had a heart attack.
Speaker 1:Here he lies with his giant, giant penis. Is what it's going to say?
Speaker 2:I can't wait.
Speaker 1:Here lies Mitch. He had a heart attack. That's a cheap obituary.
Speaker 2:I love it.
Speaker 1:Here lies Mitch and his giant penis. He had a heart attack. That's fine.
Speaker 2:Danny and me. You know what that is. That's a death notice. It's not a witch wearing Well. That's fine, Just because it tells how you died.
Speaker 1:That's fine. Here's Mitch. His heart stopped working and he still got a giant penis. How?
Speaker 2:everybody's heart stops working at death.
Speaker 1:You know why his heart stopped working?
Speaker 2:Because the blood went to his penis.
Speaker 1:Did you say giant penis?
Speaker 2:No, giant, penis Giant penis.
Speaker 1:That's what my witch reason would say. That's similar to a will. I think, I'd have a will. Do I have?
Speaker 2:a will.
Speaker 1:I don't know if I would.
Speaker 2:If you don't know, if you have a will, you don't have a will. Probably should create one. There's a difference in a will and an advance directive. Those are different, yeah, I directive, those are different, yeah, I know, I just thought they asked about a will.
Speaker 1:Your will will very likely have an advanced, or I think that's what I will when I I heard this shit, but I probably didn't answer.
Speaker 2:You probably did they at the hospital.
Speaker 1:They ask if you have an advanced directive yeah, but I think that's somebody asked about a will. Maybe that guy came in. Yeah, it was just chaplain came and asked me. Okay, I don't know maybe not I wouldn't have answered. I know what they both are, but I'm pretty sure the chaplain came in and talked to him about giving my life to Christ and asked him how to will.
Speaker 2:That's a weird thing for a chaplain to ask about a will. He's like would you like to put me in your will, sir?
Speaker 1:I think that's probably.
Speaker 2:He came in and I think he just made sure shit was in order. He was like do you have a will?
Speaker 1:I want you to know that I've seen your wife here for the last seven days refusing to leave this room, and I keep trying to get her to go outside and get some sun. I think this one made sure my shit was in order, Are you okay? And you were like please stop coming back.
Speaker 2:And I never saw him again.
Speaker 1:I never told him to let him back, I'm just kidding it saved because they couldn't fucking talk, right, and I just he was like he did come see me like almost every other day to try to get me to go outside.
Speaker 2:Maybe, like you should probably get outside and get some air. You'll feel better. And I'm like, what if something happens when I walk out of this room and he's like, we will let you know I'm gonna stop it, I know, but if I'm wild, did you came back out of that, wow? But I, if I sat and watched you the entire time, I should have set up like a nanny cam so I could watch you even when I was outside of the room.
Speaker 1:There was a nanny cam set up, I think.
Speaker 2:There was, but the hospital didn't give me the direct feed. They only gave your doctors the direct feed.
Speaker 1:You're more likely to get naked for that. I did never, ever change in your room, just my dad.
Speaker 2:He didn't change in your room, he changed in somebody else's.
Speaker 1:Thank God, that might have brought me out of my funk.
Speaker 2:Had your dad taken those socks?
Speaker 1:off his shirt. Are you awake, yep?
Speaker 2:I'm gonna be real honest and this sounds bad, but, um, you have plenty of smell yourself and listen, not because of you, but well really I mean because of you, but not because not like body smell, but um the gauze in your mouth because of the innovation. Who is that?
Speaker 1:Oh, yeah, I was. Yeah, yeah, I can see that.
Speaker 2:That one was bad, so you didn't need your dad's sock smell to add on to that.
Speaker 1:In fact, I mean, why were you so close to me to smell it?
Speaker 2:Really.
Speaker 1:Was it just out in the room?
Speaker 2:I mean, yeah, the whole room, like when you walked in you could smell it.
Speaker 1:I should put like an air freshener on my nose, like a little tree, and hang it down there Right, just a little minty freshness.
Speaker 2:I just I'm, they love that Just put mints on your tongues and Altoids Just a little. They'd be like why is there sugar spiking?
Speaker 1:A little tree air freshener on my vent tube. Oh right, they would have loved it. So what I'm establishing today is that the rake is.
Speaker 2:I mean the rake is fun, but Mitchell would rather talk about religion but it's been a thing today he's had a facebook fight about it the rake.
Speaker 1:Is the rake actually sparked my interest so much I'm gonna go look up some stuff on the rake.
Speaker 2:I need to stop you because you said the rake has piqued your interest right. I said spark, but yes, Sparked your interest Right as you said it. I heard something about the rake has parked your mattress.
Speaker 1:Parked About, parked it.
Speaker 2:I think it's just because the rake sits on the end of a mattress. So in my head I was like what do you mean? He parked on your mattress right, but weird. Hopefully not sparked your interest, okay yes just clarifying spark mattress pete manchester.
Speaker 1:Uh, so much.
Speaker 2:When I got here, I'll probably have some food yeah catch me a sea fights do some extra research do a lot of research on talk to the girl's boyfriend because apparently this is his favorite creepypasta, which means he knows more than I ever even researched. Because what does he?
Speaker 1:love about it. That's what gets me. Is that it's?
Speaker 2:but it's fun is the thing about it like it's like. It's like loving a slasher movie, loving Jason, loving Michael Myers, loving this creepypasta in particular. Like I said, I couldn't get the story, the creepypasta, to load. I had to do the fandom and their wiki, all of that, to get my information. I tried multiple times and it just would load ads and it was like it was like the words were really really light in the background, like it was just weird and I couldn't read them. Partially probably because I'm blind, partially maybe because I'm using Safari instead of like Google, and I probably should have tried to look it up at work, maybe because it's real shit Could be, Maybe because it's fucking crazy, but so Maybe because it's fucking crazy.
Speaker 2:But so talk to the girl's boyfriend, find out what he loves, because I feel like it'd be fun. We're going to find out, we're going to find out and we're going to do much better next time. Staying on topic, maybe that's probably a lie. We will be here with shenanigans, hopefully some fun stuff on YouTube and maybe some Patreon and maybe some fun stuff on youtube and maybe some patreon and maybe some tiktok instagram.
Speaker 1:We're on all the things you should you know.
Speaker 2:Subscribe new youtube channel. Yeah, the other stuff has been out for a bit it has been two channels new uh but we haven't been the best over the last couple years at keeping up to date and things. We probably A lot happened and it was never once thought about like being like, hey, let's update anybody.
Speaker 1:In my mind when I first woke up. I was like fuck the podcast, and I just couldn't say it.
Speaker 2:What was your first word? Podcast.
Speaker 1:I wish you should have not, it was your first word podcast.
Speaker 2:I wish you should have not shut up and just hooked up, I think that would have been amazing.
Speaker 1:I could have seen people really hating that you should have documented my trip the whole time. You probably shouldn't have.
Speaker 2:I mean, I've got a whole list of things that I don't think I've ever shown you. Oh that sounds fun, I did document stuff.
Speaker 1:You did document it, so I could have been like whoa.
Speaker 2:I did.
Speaker 1:I documented Mitch's the first poop since he woke up.
Speaker 2:No, I documented diagnoses and people that came to see you and things to tell you and stuff like that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you've never shown me this. I know Half the things are things to show me and you've never told me them.
Speaker 2:It was like memes that I found, which I probably did just show you.
Speaker 1:And I know I've told you Memes that I found We've talked about that Shit I found when Mitch was asleep.
Speaker 2:Like, just like things that made me think of you, kind of things, you know. Not Just like things that made me think of you, Kind of things you know Not the rake that.
Speaker 1:I wish that there was no rake Rake, oh yeah, no, not the rake. I wish I'd have woke up, though when that came I'd have been like hey, is this your wife? And just been completely scared like I didn't know who you were. They did ask if I was your daughter once. It made me happy. I was your daughter once. It made me happy, Well fuck you and them. There's no defense no, this shit happened before I was six.
Speaker 2:You had so many tubes and stuff, though.
Speaker 1:I didn't the other time they asked me.
Speaker 2:Without looking at your chart, no one would have known anything. There was so much stuff, so much stuff.
Speaker 1:Before this happened, there wasn't all this stuff.
Speaker 2:Once.
Speaker 1:And people still said this to me.
Speaker 2:Once.
Speaker 1:No more than once.
Speaker 2:Well, I can't help that.
Speaker 1:Yes so no, so fuck them.
Speaker 2:But it doesn't happen now because this aged me.
Speaker 1:I'm glad I could tell.
Speaker 2:Now we look similar in age.
Speaker 1:YouTube, patreon, instagram.
Speaker 2:Patreon, instagram, facebook, all that shit, all of the platforms that podcasts are on correct.
Speaker 1:You can join Patreon for completely free. You can give some money each month. Either way, I don't give a shit what you do.
Speaker 2:We are going to get better about having fun things, posting stuff on there. Snip some outtakes.
Speaker 1:Snip-a-snip-a.
Speaker 2:Nonsense, you know. Every day we have ideas of things you want to see. We love ideas.
Speaker 1:We do.
Speaker 2:Help us out.
Speaker 1:So the anything we can do, Any support helps make a good show. We try to do it ourselves. We do pretty well, I guess, for what we got.
Speaker 2:For what we know.
Speaker 1:Uh September 13th, Oliveville, kentucky.
Speaker 2:We're going to do the Bigfoot Festival.
Speaker 1:First annual Carter Kennedy Bigfoot Fest. Yes, so be there. They're expecting a good crowd to show up. Yep, some guest speakers. You've got the Turtle man and the Wild man. There you go, not gonna pretend I know a lot about these gentlemen. Turtle man, I think, does what the Turtle man does. Cares your does the turtles. The Wild man, I think, is wild. Listen.
Speaker 2:I know the names and that's it.
Speaker 1:But I think it's going to be a good time.
Speaker 2:It sounds like there's going to be a good turnout.
Speaker 1:So if you're not, there, you're missing out Guest speakers first hand encounters storytelling food trucks, vendors, music. It's going to be a good time. All of us can take you from noon to 7 on a Saturday. You can get shit to do, so come down, hang out.
Speaker 2:Support a small community. They could use it.
Speaker 1:That is a true story. They're bringing something real cool to the areas Instead of bitching.
Speaker 2:But there's nothing to do, right.
Speaker 1:Come down and hang out. It's a free event. I don't think it even costs any money. Come down, spend a few bucks on some lemonade or a t-shirt and hang out for the day and have a good time. Yeah so we'll be there doing a live podcast.
Speaker 2:I think it's family friendly.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it is Probably not. Nah, I guess our podcast will have to be family friendly.
Speaker 2:I imagine it'll be family friendly.
Speaker 1:I don't think I'll be drinking, so we'll be there probably doing a.
Speaker 2:It'll be more, I don't even want to say darkness. It'll be more cryptid-related, animal-related, I think we're basically. Beast-related. I don't know. Whatever you believe Bigfoot is yeah we're doing basically.
Speaker 1:So I will know about this because it's basically a Bigfoot episode Yep, so we're going to get plenty of Bigfoot information.
Speaker 2:Info. We would love Bigfoot testimonies.
Speaker 1:If you know any stories, have witnessed anything yourself, have experienced anything yourself.
Speaker 2:If you have a theory. I would love to hear every crazy theory, every scientific theory, any theory.
Speaker 1:If you heard that he was a Mormon, send it to us, because the wife has heard he was a Mormon.
Speaker 2:I don't know.
Speaker 1:Nothing against Mormons. I'm not saying they're hairy, but we have heard he was a Mormon. I don't know Nothing against Mormons.
Speaker 2:I'm not saying they are hairy, but we have heard this one's hairy. I have heard that he is an animal. I've heard that he is biblical. I have heard that he was a Mormon. I've heard that he is a cryptid. I want to hear what you think about Bigfoot. Email us.
Speaker 1:We know my thoughts.
Speaker 2:I was going to say text us, text us, call us, but we don't have our phone numbers out there, so probably not those things. But you know, email us, send us a facebook message whatever, or just catch us at the bigfoot fest and tell us your story well, I don't want that it's fine if you don't like our podcast, because if you don't like it, we probably don't like you right and don't send me a picture of your penis if you don't like it sounds like you're begging for penis pictures, just saying nope because you knew what to say, but mitch kaiser, ginormous that's
Speaker 1:what the corner said anyway I don't know.
Speaker 2:I don't know what I was going to say. It was gone.
Speaker 1:The drink hit, she said we it has we, we.
Speaker 2:Yes, Like I said, catch us on your favorite podcast site, catch us on YouTube. Subscribe like, share, shares are a godsend.
Speaker 1:That's important.
Speaker 2:That's important. Leave us a review, preferably five stars, but we understand, you know. Just don't tell us, don't leave us the hates, because, well, if you don't like us, we don't care, that's a true story. But yeah, Catch us on everything.
Speaker 1:Trade.
Speaker 2:Send us messages, keep in touch.
Speaker 1:Listen to what's up. Hopefully this is the start of something new, something great. An every week thing, yes, so hopefully we'll be putting new episodes out, possibly every Sunday.
Speaker 2:It depends on how fast you can get it out.
Speaker 1:I think, to make sure we can, nobody does nothing. That's a church day. I'm not trying to say that.
Speaker 2:A lot of people just it's a slower day for people Sunday relaxing. So, if you're relaxing, it's a church day. I'm not trying to say that it's a slower day for people Sunday you're relaxing.
Speaker 1:So if you're relaxing, it's a good day to listen to podcasts.
Speaker 2:It's a good day to listen on your Sunday drive, right yeah.
Speaker 1:You're mosey around some back roads and listen to some podcasts. It's a good day to do it.
Speaker 2:Let us have your ear.
Speaker 1:This was Season 3, episode 1 on the Rake. Thanks for listening, thanks for hanging out.
Speaker 2:Stay weird.
Speaker 1:We will catch you next time.
Speaker 2:Later Bye.
